We're glad mum's happy, but we're not ready to meet dad's replacement

DEAR DEIDRE: MY mum thrust a diamond ring under our noses on the day which would have been our late father’s birthday.

It was on her wedding finger but she said it was a “friendship ring”.
It was a gift from her new man.

My sister and I were horrified. Dad passed away suddenly with cancer. He was 56. My mum is 55 now.

She met this guy before the pandemic. He’s 62.

He sounds nice and Mum is happy but whatever we talk about, she brings the conversation back around to him.

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She’s desperate for us to meet him but neither of us want to.

I’m 28 and my sister is 26. It has been three years since we lost Dad but it feels like yesterday.

DEIDRE SAYS: I’m sorry to hear about your loss.

Your mum no doubt misses him as you both do. But when you’ve left home, your mum will be alone. She may dread that time.

This man has put a spring in her step again but she’s not replacing your dad.

Suggest you go out as a family so that she can introduce him while you can get to know him.

You’ll find support through Sue Ryder (sueryder.org, 0808 164 4572) which offers six weeks’ free bereavement counselling.

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE Would my lover leave his wife if I had more of a career?

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